[New Music] Cheryl Cole’s awful new dubstep song “Love Killer”

This new Cheryl Cole album is going to be so fucking bad. First their was the Rihanna knock-off “Call My Name”, which is catchy enough in its sheer inoffensiveness, but then our senses were assaulted with the single’s official b-side “Make You Go” — another recycled Rihanna jam in which Cheryl ‘sings’ in an exotic accent over a Major Lazer-sampling island beat.

Now we’ve been gifted with the worst song to come out of A Million Lights thus far with “Love Killer” — a hideously generic dubstep tune that even Jessie J wouldn’t use to wipe her ass with.

The hot mess was unleashed on Cheryl’s official Soundcloud account earlier today along with a link to pre-order her new album, so one has to assume that this is probably a cut from A Million Lights.

The only aspect of this song that I like is that I’m pretending it’s a diss to Miss Nicole ‘Killer Love’ Scherzinger for snatching Cheryl’s rightful spot on the X Factor judging panel.

I can’t wait for Nicole’s response. This is gonna be like Biggie Vs. Tupac all over again, except with bad music.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, May 22nd, 2012 at 7:25 pm and is filed under New Music. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

  • Jack

    i actually love it!!!

  • http://twitter.com/onlykriswithak K.G. Roman

    Damnit, Chezza. Is it me, or do I kinda smell a little bit of a SPICA swaggerjack with this?! Bump Nicole Stillnotasinger.

  • http://twitter.com/ICONI3 ICONI3

    Hope she doesn’t have much input on the new Girls aloud album.

  • http://twitter.com/ericyumyum Ericyummerz

    I love love love “call my name” but .. seriously.. what the heck is this?!?? i’d rather have her do a dub dance track like Cher Lloyds’ “Dub On The Track”

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Nathalia-Ferrari/1251601953 Nathalia Ferrari

    I like the song and you have to admit once for all that you just don’t like her. You can’t be fair with Cheryl. That’s it. I can’t wait for the whole thing, by the way.

  • theprophetblog

    But I think “Yeah Yeah” is flawless and I love Girls Aloud. I also like the 3 words song. So yeah, I like her when she doesn’t suck.

  • Pez

    Who cares? She could release a mash up of Friday with beethoven, it all doesn’t matter. The almighty aloud is coming back!

    I’m a mans man proph, I’ve never in my life uttered the phrase “shaking and crying”, but I’m gonna do it.

    I’m shaking and crying while I wait.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Nathalia-Ferrari/1251601953 Nathalia Ferrari

    First album is fucking flawless. MLR is an average album but she made a mistake for not releasing Waiting as single. 
    I like everything thus far. She’s taking a chance and I don’t see Love Killer as an awful song… i like, I think it’s good. 
    To be honest, I can’t wait to see her live performances cause she’s got sick dance skills.
    And I can’t deny, ya know? I like Cheryl and I’m rooting for her to be a smash in America.

  • theprophetblog

     Yes Pez, almighty Aloud is coming back, not almight Cheryl Cole!

    Girls Aloud comeback = shaking & crying
    Cheryl Cole comeback = vomiting and blocking ears

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Trevor-Szuba-Schneider/100000290157462 Trevor Szuba-Schneider

    i like dubstep like this and she is singing a good melody.  it’s a win.

  • mimifan

    i really like this. proph i think u need to take a break.

  • blah

    Killer Love > This trash. nuff said. 

  • I • D • G • A • F

    Someone call her handlers…this bitch is DONE!!!!

    Bitch needs to cease her fuckery, regain her composure…and say she tried and failed. This is utter gutter.

  • Clitpanini

    I couldn’t listen the whole way through. I can only assume her team is deaf, how else can you explain why this hot mess was checked off to go public? Take several seats Cheryl. Actually, take them all.

  • SerferTJ

    U failed to mention “Telescope”, which is actually a really well done ballad for Cheryl!
    Anyways, this song just feels…off. It’s kinda cute, but it doesn’t feel finished, or it’s just missing the UMPH. I cud see some one making a good remix out of this tho.

    Hate to say it, but Amelle from the Sugababes PERFECTED the dubstep-pop thing. The full version of this song is SOOOOOO AMAZING! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fp-xpsREXJk
     

  • http://www.facebook.com/daniel.caunic Daniel Caunic

    I like the song too :)

  • http://twitter.com/ETalk90 EntertainmenTalk

    It’s not great, but I enjoyed this more than “Call My Name”.

  • nonminti

    even she sounds bored singing this song :/ but when I listen to twice it grows on me,I think I like more than the first single,but then I think this song shouldn’t be a single,it’s like a not bad filler song,but ten la la la la loooove you want some more…

  • Guest

    This would have been so hot if Britney recorded it. It’s like an Inside Out/Seal It With A Kiss hybrid. UH HUHHHHH

  • Ibreathepop

    FUCK U PROPH. This Song is not THAT bad!
    FUCK FUCK FUCK

  • Aryo

    nicole stillnotasnihger?, fuck u stupid ass delusional cunt

  • Aryo

    fuck YOU, the song IS bad lol

  • Aryo

    Nicole >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> cheryl 
    at EVERYTHING , no one can deny it

  • Justin

    I’m more excited with Nicole’s response track. I’m sure she’d kill it with sick dancing + live vocals.

  • http://www.facebook.com/viorel.borgovan Viorel Octavian Borgovan

     This is not bad, THIS IS AWFUL!!! WORST SONG EVER!!! What’s wrong with you, JB fan or what?

  • http://twitter.com/BOBBYADAN Bobby

    not too too bad…there’s something about her voice that makes me like her music “just enough.”

  • http://twitter.com/onlykriswithak K.G. Roman

     Tsk tsk tsk. Never throw shade to the bitch with the umbrella. Please check out Nicole circa her “Popstars” days compared to now. I used to stan HARD for her, but her vocals are shit nowadays. Also, namecalling is for the schoolyard. We’re adults, no?