Mariah Carey tries to save “Triumphant” with the ‘Vintage Throwback Remix’

Mariah Carey is one shady bitch!
After moaning about her desire to bring back music to the days when R&B didn’t need to crossover and wanting to avoid dance trends on her new album, Mimi has just gone and dropped a re-sung and remixed dance version of her atrocious new single “Triumphant (Get Em)”.
It goes under the name of the “Vintage Throwback Remix”, but it’s virtually a completely different song than the outdated hip-hop slush she premiered yesterday. This is basically Mariah’s way of diving headfirst into the dance genre, while still pretending that she’s a gritty urban diva who’s totally above joining the Usher’s and Nicki Minaj’s of the industry.
With that said, the remixed version of “Triumphant” ain’t bad. It harms back to the classic Mariah remixes of the ’90s, but it’s still current enough to sound fresher than a dusty old David Morales mix from 1994. And the best part? Mariah actually sounds like the lead artist and not a featured hook singer!
To sum it up, the “Vintage Throwback Remix” is hot tamale for a remix, but still disappointing as lead single material.
Couldn’t Mariah have just recorded a pop song from scratch like a normal person? Every album she’s ever done has been filled to to the brim with pop-leaning gems, yet she chooses now of all times to reinvent herself as hip-hop’s first lady.
Get it together, Mimi. Don’t make us send you back to the looney bin.