Bruno Mars premieres the video for his Sting rip-off “Locked Out of Heaven”

I couldn’t believe my fucking eyes when I checked the credits for Bruno Mars‘ new single “Locked Out of Heaven” and saw that he didn’t actually sample Sting or The Police. Not even Lady GaGa’s Madonna knock-off “Born this Way” is as shamelessly unoriginal as “Locked Out of Heaven” is. Mars essentially just mashed up some of The Police’s old hits, added some lyrics about beating up a good pussy over the top, and called it day.

Seriously, was GaGa Mars on another one of his infamous coke binges when he wrote this? He probably recorded with Jeff Bhasker while they were both stoned and high, having just spent the previous night partying non-stop at Frank Ocean’s pad with Amanda Bynes and Miguel.

Shade aside, I gotta admit that “Locked Out of Heaven” is by far the best Bruno Mars song ever made (hardly a difficult feat to accomplish). It’s the only thing he’s ever done that hasn’t had me reaching for the earplugs ten seconds in, and I’m gonna thank The Police for that and nobody else.

Fuck it. I may as well just pretend that this is The Police’s new single. That way I don’t have to deal with the psychological trauma that comes from knowing that I like a Bruno Mars song.

This entry was posted on Monday, October 15th, 2012 at 7:25 pm and is filed under Music Videos. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

  • reductivered

    Why can’t he just fuck off from the music scene all together tbqh. His dreary, over the top and forced legato and boring radio friendly ballads make me throw up in my mouth every time I hear them.

  • cuntley

    PROPH THE NEW GIRLS ALOUD SINGLE LEAKED AND IT’S AMAZING. POST PLZ!

    http://soundcloud.com/black-melody/01-something-new

  • Dan D,

    The new Girls Aloud single is horrid. It’s a mediocre Love Machine lyric and melody smashed with a generic Something Kinda Ooh production. It’s a pale vision of their former glory, kind of like a lot of the B-Sides on Out of Control were weaker versions of Biology. I have lost all hope in pop music.

  • mergong

    Oh nooo…if I wanna hear this same ol’ Calvin-esque beat/melody, I rather listen to Spending All My Time instead

  • mergong

    well, there’s “Veritas”, so all hope is not lost

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1127181558 Andrés Felipe Rodríguez

    I’m a sucka for Bruno and I don’t care, he got a good voice, writes some decent songs and have good sounds, so IDK, I like the single, the video is whatever, but love the song.

  • bob

    It’s very police-esque with a hint of B-52′s (Juno) but given the shit-stained dance crap we have infesting our radios, this is a very welcome injection to that landscape, even if it’s totally unoriginal in every way shape and form. However, I don’t mind thinking about 80′s era Michael Jackson and Sting have hot anal sex in a recording studio to give birth to Bruno Mars and this song.

  • http://twitter.com/HBF82 Bojan Goranović

    Agree with Proph, but like both song and the video, tbh.

  • http://www.facebook.com/robert.mcculley.3 Robert McCulley

    I can’t believe I like this song too! I did not know he ripped off the Police – that explains it.

  • theprophetblog

    Veritas sucks

  • http://www.twitter.com/illuminateh Brandon

    Bruno Mars IS SO FUCKING ANNOYING.

  • http://twitter.com/IIIvarrr Ivar Markowski

    I don’t think people understand how much control music executives have over artists. Bruno Mars loves to dabble in many musical genres, and he gets shit for it. Calling him unoriginal for being greatly influenced by music is ridiculous. It’s hard to create a sound that is completely unique anymore, that’s why shit like dubstep was created. Praise him for bringing back an old style and making it his own.

  • http://www.facebook.com/justin.l.lecea Justin Lecea

    Music is recycling it’s self just like art and fashion. Unfortunately, most people won’t have a real appreciation or understanding of the influences that mainstream music has borrowed from and often blatantly stolen from. To make matters worse we’re at an all time low for originality when it comes to lyrics featured in most music today which contains barely any substance.

  • drewxman

    check out chris jane’s COVER of Bruno Mars Locked Out of heaven. She KILLS IT!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=3LqZBeVdMyw

  • tonyp

    The guitar licks are not from “message in a bottle.” They are from”spirits in a material world.”

  • Divatude

    OMG! As a serious fan of The Police and Sting, I have to agree with the commentary. When I first heard this, I thought I was listening to a Ghost in the Machine album revival and was LOVING IT … but it had absolutely nothing to do with Bruno Mars. Let’s be very clear here.

  • mb

    it’s not a sample from the police that he used. he sampled phil collins song easy lover

  • Joseph

    When I first heard this song I thought it was probably a long lost Police tune I’d never heard that had been neglected because of the ridiculous lyrics and music. Sadly it’s a tune that plays regularly on modern pop stations and was recently written, and not by the Police or Sting. Rarely have I heard such a blatant copying of style and music. This guy deserves every bit of criticism he gets for this ripoff.

  • Cecescooter

    No doubt! When I heard the first few seconds of the track I thought maybe it was Gotye (who sometimes sounds Sting like) but when I heard the Copeland-esque beats, and that guitar…I thought someone was sampling The Police! Surely Sting and the boys have some royalties due them.

  • real prophets dont blog

    Dear False Prophet,
    You seem like a total douche bag who does not really have anything going on in his life so you just give negative opinions of artists. It’s funny how you give so much attention to music you don’t like but don’t really have any talent or expertise to make your opinion of any worth. I’m not the biggest fan of Mars or Sting but I do like the song. Judging from your critique of Mars, do you believe Damien Marley is ripping off Bob Marley? I mean do they do sound quite similar. Anyways, do you have any music that you have originally composed or produced yourself? If so, I would love to hear and tell you how horrible it sounds just like your god-awful blogging.

    Sincerely,
    Ashamed of being the same species as you

  • JoshuaE73

    The only band that ripped off the Police more than Bruno Mars was the Police.

  • Taco Bell mike

    Whole heartily agreed. I bet this dip shit plays with a live band to make it look legit. My question is…….. If his “band” does play this song live its no longer sampling right? It’s just copying right? Anyway….. Well put.

  • XCM-Irish

    Hey,
    I can’t blame you for not knowing the terrible song, but the melody in the verse is very much like “Alcazar – Crying At The Dicotheque” – which is aswell a cover/rip-off (I don’t know but it’s basically a copy) of a 1979 song called “Spacer” by Sheila & B. Devotion, except for the melody, so I don’t know where that is from

  • manuel

    one thing is being inspired and another thing is rip off from a genius and calling it your own… every time i listen to that shit i just think how sassy he is to play something that everyone with some sense of music would link it to the police. People like this just make music for money and it sickens me, so dont go with the excuse that the executives pushes him, he just havent done any hit recently so he desperately came out with this. He doesnt deserve the respect of being call a musician

  • Cmed

    I was born in 86 and have never been a sting or police fan, but as soon as I heard this song on the radio I immediately thought it was a police rip off. Why can’t anyone make anything original anymore?

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jt-Lachappelle/545113985 Jt Lachappelle

    Bullshit Markowski. Pure bullshit. Bringing back an old style and making it his own? Theres taking inspiration from an artist and then theres making your shit sound EXACTLY like an artist, which is whats called a RIPOFF, which is what that shamelless fuck Mars did. What a huge wiener. Even if his pupputmasters made him do it, he is a huge fag for not respecting Sting and telling them to get fucked. I thought Gotye was the worst, but now theres a new king. Its fucking incredible how lame people are…

  • http://www.facebook.com/jacob.prater.184 Jacob Prater

    I thought this was the Police when I first heard it…..